Category Archives: Expat Life

George Schorschi’s 4 New Stages of Culture Shock

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As any good expat should know before living abroad, there are four commonly accepted stages of culture shock. These are:

  1. Honeymoon Stage, where everything is just awesome
  2. Negotiation Stage, where everything is not as awesome as before
  3. Adjustment Stage, where nothing is awesome
  4. Adaptation Stage, where you realize awesome is a relative term and there’s still plenty to love

But what if there are more than just these four stages? It’s my humble opinion that the concept of culture shock is a little outdated. And after having spent quite some time as a foreigner in a strange land, I hereby propose four new stages for your consideration.

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Odds for Eurovision Song Contest 2017 Ridiculousness

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Alright, Europe! It’s almost time for the event of the year, EUROVISION 2017! Last year’s tumultuous event was full of shocking moments that left many fans stunned- except, of course, for my dear readers who were prepared for pretty much anything thanks to the handy betting odds I made. So what can we expect this time around? More chaos? More craziness? MORE WIND MACHINES?! Read on to find out more.

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The 5 Types of Posts on Expat Forums

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Congratulations! You’ve made the bold decision to leave your home country and live abroad. It’s going to be an incredible adventure, filled with challenges that will force you to grow as a person. You likely have many questions and concerns, but the internet is here to help! Thanks to the wonders of modern technology, hundreds of thousands of expats and immigrants have congregated to forums on social media and beyond. Here they offer their assistance and comfort for any sort of troubles you might have. There’s just one problem with these expat forums- and that’s the type of posts you’ll find there. Curious? Here are the 5 types of posts you’re likely to find on expat forums.

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The 5 Types of Responses on Expat Forums

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Congratulations! You made the bold decision to leave your home country and live abroad. It was an incredible adventure, filled with challenges that forced you to grow as a person. You likely have tons of experiences and advice you’d like to share, and the internet is here to help! Thanks to the wonders of modern technology, hundreds of thousands of expats and immigrants have congregated to forums on social media and beyond. Here you can offer your assistance and comfort for any sort of troubles your fellow travelers might have. There’s just one problem with these expat forums- and that’s the type of responses you’ll find there. Curious? Here are the 5 types of responses you’re likely to find on expat forums.

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Your German Easter Schedule

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If there’s one thing Germany knows, it’s the importance of holidays. On these “Feiertagen” you might mistake what used to be a busy Altstadt street for a set off the newest season of “The Walking Dead: Europe” (might even find a few Walkers/drunks, depending on the holiday!). But when it’s Easter- the country basically shuts down for four days. So what can you do as a poor foreigner looking for something to ease the boredom? Read on!

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Karneval Bingo Card

HELAAAAAU! It’s everyone’s favorite time of year- Karneval! A time of costumes, candy, and booze which lasts only a few days (but really feels like weeks in the morning). And while some people might think of it as “German Halloween”, it’s just so, so much more. So in order to truly appreciate the experience, here’s a bingo card for you to print and mark while experiencing the merriment! Pro tip- laminate it so you can use it next year/easily wipe off vomit.

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German Deliveries: A Guide for Expats

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There’s one thing that I’ve learned to love while living in Germany: Amazon.de and its English option. Instead of wandering throughout random stores and having some less than satisfactory experiences, all I need to do is point, click, and pray to God I’ll be home when the package arrives. Because in a country which prides efficiency and order above all else, dealing with deliveries remains a thorny issue*. Think you can handle it? Then take this quiz and see how well you do!

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George Schorschi’s Guide to German Cuisine: Holiday Edition

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It’s that time again- gather with loved ones, reflect on joys and sorrows of the year, and partake in traditional foods passed down from generation to generation. Or maybe you’re a million miles from home like me and eating canned food by single candle flame as the German winter chips away at your holiday spirit. Either way, food is involved! And since the last article was so popular (the videos not so much), here’s the long awaited follow up with a seasonal twist. So kick back, turn on “Dinner for One”, and enjoy yet another take on German cuisine!

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German Passive Aggression: A Guide for Expats

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Germany is a beautiful country, renowned for its economic prowess and success. Living here as a foreigner has been a true privilege- I have enjoyed many benefits such as sick leave, fantastic vacation plans, clean streets and more. I also realize that such benefits do not come without cost. Indeed, such a wonderful utopia could not exist without strict rules that dictate how society should thrive. And what does any good German* do when they witness an individual violating such a rule? React with passive aggression, of course! But if you’re an immigrant like me and haven’t quite mastered it yet- don’t worry! This handy guide will have you silently seething in no time.
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Make Your Own Expat Leaving Letter

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Living abroad comes with its own unique adventures, such as finding an apartment, trying different foods, embracing foreign culture, etc. It’s a big reason why expats tend to stick together and share their experiences. But if you’ve ever been a part of an expat group, there’s one experience which you quickly become aware of- and that’s going away parties for when someone decides to leave. After having been to several in a month I can safely say that it’s never easy telling everyone about your decision. That’s why I’ve crafted this handy letter for when you decide to leave your expat friends behind! Please feel free to use it whenever you like.

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